Endless story: I hurt because I’m hurt.

We refuse to accept that life is not designed to be as we always intend and whether we want to or not, it will always teach us what we need to learn.

Doesn’t it happen to you that on certain occasions
the problems are anchored in their heads and prevents them from thinking about something else and somehow
How do they need to get rid of it?

Well, that’s how I am on account of this new pandemic. No! I am not talking about the Coronavirus (that is going to happen in less than what a rooster crows or sneezes a Chinese man), I am talking about that epidemic of “broken” people who are breaking everyone who crosses their path under the pretext of disappointment and the heartbreak they experienced.

In this infection, the most predominant symptom is to take on the task of perpetuating that feeling of grief, anguish and pain with the sole purpose of keeping it burning so that we can project it – explicitly – on others and vehemently demonstrate that we were hurt, that we have nothing better to offer and that under any circumstance the worst will always have to be anticipated, giving rise to the mantra: “I hurt because I am hurt”

By repeating this to ourselves, we seek to exempt ourselves from the task of healing, of purging ourselves of our emotional ailments (which sometimes even become physical) and of making peace with the past; on the contrary, we want to solve everything with the infallible technique of this post modern era, The famous one: Lock !, Lock !, Lock! (from WhatsApp, Facebook and Instagram respectively), an act that has been equal to Donald Trump’s toupee: ugly and totally out of place.

We have become accustomed to being “in mourning”, to regress, regret and magnify the warning signs of catastrophe. We dedicate our existence to increasing the ego associated with suffering. Yes, the Ego. Although you do not believe it (read with the intro voice from the eighties series), the Ego also intervenes in those moments in which we believe that what happened to us, was the strongest, the most hurtful, the worst and that surely that someone else does not understand it because my duel is simply the Rocky Balboa of duels.

We lose valuable time in that bile wallow that reminds us of what they “did” to us and we lose valuable people in that continuous replication of our fears because we refuse to accept that life is not designed to be as we always intend and want. or not, it will always teach us what we need to learn.

At this point, it is clear that playing the “Vistima” will not solve anything for us, the process to end this endless story must be a conscious personal practice of healing, -even though it sounds very Dalai Lama- each one must decide to close the decadent kill or die cycle because at the end of the day it is evident that we all end up losing.

Of course, there is no foolproof method of changing what our experiences have made us and breaking this miserable chain that is leading us to relationships that end before they begin; That is why it is worth trying everything: from techniques such as ho’oponopono (No, it is not a Kamasutra position), to sending everything to hell, but in a conscious way so that we do not end up smearing and anointing others.

In all these years of experience as entrusted with lost causes (Alias: Rehabilitación de gamines), I have realized that everyone wants to be saved, that most of us do not want to hurt, but we do not know how to get out of that spiral of destruction; Rather, we are assholes.

The truth is that our unconscious arrogance prevents us from carrying out the only act that can save us: Forgive. Forgive and reconcile with ourselves, because in the end, we know that we are the result of the decisions we make and that what really hurt us were our expectations and not the Baracunatana that or the creeping Animal that.